Archive for January, 2009
Lessons From A Hippo Hiney
Zoos are places where the world comes to you. You can adventurously safari in your kakis with a chilled Coke in hand, yet still get your lawn mowed on the same day. As I am always on the hunt to discover the hand of God in Creation, I was delighted to learn something of
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When Shamu Flew Over My House
Do you ever wonder if kids have some kind of special in with God when it comes to prayer? Of course they do. They generally just believe what His Word says and trust that He will do the stuff He promises to do and be who He
Your HorrorScope
Wondering About the Sign you were born under? Here’s what the Bible has to say… Aries March 21 - April 19 You are under the first sign of the Zodiac which represents a new beginning, and man, you need a new beginning.
Roaring Lions
Most people in the western world live in the urban jungle where the closest thing to a lion’s ferocious roar is a graying, grinning middle-aged man screaming down the street on his “lookie here at my very cool new
Obituary: Quoting Ralph
As in Emerson, that is. Ralph Waldo Emerson, the oft quoted American poet, lecturer, philosopher and minister. He grew up in an orthodox Christian home, the son of a preacher. He even went to Harvard Divinity
Stumbling Blocks, a church game
Never too young to play Stumbling Blocks We at the Family Entertainment Research Institute were shocked to discover the wildly popular church game: Stumbling Blocks. The premise is simple: you ante
An Open Letter to Bono
Dear Bono. Thanks for the humanitarian relief effort you’ve done for Africa. You’ve used your celebrity to charm world leaders into forgiving billions in debt. Well done. Ummm, coming from the country that helped make
Other Names For God?
Sure, we know the Almighty as the Alpha and Omega, the Great I AM. There is a long popular poster in Christian circles that features various names and titles of God. He has more names and titles than the queen of England!
Obituary: Al Capone
Gangster Al Capone From a tombstone in Mt. Carmel Cemetery; Chicago, Illinois we have a three word inscription… “My Jesus Mercy” And what haloed saint uttered so sublime a prayer? Why, none other than the notorious
Dream of Migrant Workers
There is a huge immigration debate in America. Our borders are overrun with illegal migrant workers who are often depicted as: aliens, uneducated, dirty, fruit pickers, field hands. These prejudicial images and stereotypes
The Window at the End of the Universe
My cosmic quest for the fabled Window at the End of the Universe was over. Suddenly, it appeared before me suspended in space. Like a pilgrim finding the Grail, I stood staring slack-jawed at the Window fearing it was a mirage or a figment of archetypal desire. Yet I dared hope. It was real. I pulled
Dark and Sultry Night
(To be read a la’ Bogart) It was a dark and sultry night. Typical in the gumshoe game, I was working late wrapping up a case. Soft
Casa, Blanket? Not For Newborn Savior
No Vacancy (With apologies to Humphry Bogart). “Of all the Inn joints in all the towns in all the Roman Empire, she walks into mine,” sobbed tormented innkeeper Marvin the Sloshite of Bethlehem. He says the bad
Final Quotes
While taking a quiet walk through a cemetery, I couldn’t help but notice that all tombstones have a start - and more significantly - a stop, date. Yeah, such a realization gave me the willies, too, but it’s
Coastal Confessions of a Former Parrothead
Jimmy Buffett Slapped Here! Dear Jimmy Buffet, I’m resigning as a Parrothead and am saying goodbye to you and the whimsically dubbed Coral Reefer Band. Lately, I’ve had some changes in latitude and changes
Greenhouse Gases Offensive to God
Creating Greenhouse gasses (Editor’s Note: If you’re easily offended, you might want to skip this one!) Rev. Red Welts of the Only Right Church in Petty, Kansas, known for protesting at the funerals
