Archive for February, 2009
They Should Be Church Theme Songs
Christian pop pioneer Larry Norman once asked, “Why should the devil have all the good music?” And drat, drat drat!, he’s got all the good theme songs, too. In our Marketing Is Ministry world, we need to stand out. For all the hour’s we’ve wasted in front
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Getting Kicked On Route 666
Route 666 If you’re idle as if motorless Travel the wide way The highway of eeriness. You’ll get kicked on Route 666! - pop song popularized by The Hellions Route 666 doesn’t appear on maps anymore as people
Obituary: George Carlin & The Seven Words You Can't Say
The late George Carlin Comedian George Carlin recently died. A cultural commentator, jester and religious cynic, he helped define modern comedy. Known for liberal use of profanity, he prompted a Supreme Court decision
Feminism's Bitter Fruit
Feminism's Scarlet Woman You dare speak out against feminism? Why, you sexiest, oppressive, testosterone-driven, club-wielding, backward, grunting, knuckle-dragging Neanderthal… Whoa. Hold on there, angry
Preacher Abandons Bible For Dylan Lyrics
Gotta serve somebody - but who? Calling his movement The Zimmerman Way, the once Reverend Chuckie Leven announced to his surprised congregation that he would no longer teach from the Bible and would, in the name of postmodernism,
Prisoner 354
[This post may seem strange. It was written in 1997 and circulated all over the net without my name attached. I was praying in the Spirit about 3 am when this came. I was wide awake yet had a very real dream.
Choosin' Your Delusion
“My name is in the Bible prophetically because I am divinely chosen by God. You will not question me,” declares D’Lusion, mega prophet and supreme apostle of the Almighty, the man with whom God speaks
Pilate Program Suspended
Pontius Pilate, Motivational Speaker The Roman Empire has temporarily suspended the Divide and Conquer tour of popular motivational speaker Pontius Pilate, who, while touring in deepest Gaul, was hospitalized for “exhaustion.”
Bryan's Musings: Think Stink
The real secret recipe... Fear is the ultimate weapon. Sure, sure. Those nuclear bombs are spooky. One flash and you’re a cindered memory a la mushroom. Explosives can maim and kill. They say you never hear the bullet
A Beautiful Church In St. Louis, MO
“By this all men will know you are my disciples…” - Jesus I used to be an out of Church Christian. Why? Because I loved God with all my heart and had grown sick of the ambition, the backstabbing, the cut throat competition. Well, Bryan, the world is a fallen, evil place. Yep. I am talking about
Retaking The Ship!
We sail for my Father's kingdom... I dreamed I was aboard a luxury liner, the good ship Christendom, converted curiously enough from a battleship, cruising blissfully through a lazy blue ocean. The cruise ads had
Reclaiming Vincent
Think of the great artists of the Church; Michelangelo, Bach, there have been too many to list. One name is absent from the Who’s Who of Christian artists who touched the world for God: Vincent Van Gogh. Wait. Isn’t
As Dead Fish Who Dance Madly
And the day started so well... While sitting in my favorite restaurant having a quiet, inexpensive lunch with my lovely wife, I watched a mini life and death drama unfold whose images will haunt me for the rest of my earthly
Jihadist Spelling Bee-Heading A Disaster
The main tenant of Islam. Since Baathits death squads in Iraq still friendly to Saddam were looking to execute him in the name of the All Merciful One, acknowledged terrorist Ackmed decided he was pro-Western after all
Extended Warranty Plans For Salvation?
The church postcards kept coming with the same dire warning: “Your salvation has or is about to expire. Call To Renew – While You Can!” “I was pretty sure I was still right with God,” said sobbing Sarah Grace,
Club Mud
Like it or not, you're expected Save for sex, there are more euphemisms about dying than any other subject. Christians like to talk about Tailgating with Jesus, while telephone workers make reference to placing one
